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Celebrity Apprentice, Episode 2

Posted by tvtwaddle on March 14, 2011

Celebrity Apprentice, Episode 2

Air Time: Sunday, March 13, 2011

Credit for Theme: Dionne Warwick

Written by tvTwaddle

Okay, here’s (What’s it All About) Alfie:

Star receives a visit from the cardiologist who saved her life. She gives him a check made out to the American Heart Association in the amount of $169,000. It is to benefit  Anyone who had a heart. He is thankful.

The teams assemble outside in This empty place. They are in front of Madison Square Garden and Donald tells them it is undergoing  a major overhaul. Who cares? What’s that got to do with anything? There is no connection between this segment and the challenge ahead. Donald observes that Richard and Jose are not friends. They just Walk on By.

The assignment is given. They must write a children’s story based on one of the members of their team, and perform it live in front of 4 and 5 year old children. They will be judged on Originality, Age Appropriateness, and Overall Story. They are told to decide who their Project Managers will be. Meatloaf volunteers for the men’s team. He loves kids. The girls quibble, setting the tone for the whole challenge. Lisa is volunteered.  She protests then gives in. NeNe interviews that they chose her because she couldn’t handle it, and they just need to get her out.

Backbone headquarters and Meatloaf wants all their characters to be animals. It needs a moral to the story. Mark and John are both writers who can handle the writing task. They quickly choose Lil John as the main character and the theme is about finding the superhero in all of us.  They display great brainstorming and task assignment according to talent and skill. When Margie the publisher (one of their judges) comes by she advises them against rhyming, unless there is someone who is particularly good at it in their group. John Rich takes that as a personal challenge and decides to make the story a rhyming country song. He came up with some great rhyming that encapsulates their story.  Jose feels his writing skills have been overlooked and he decides to bicker over the word “Nobody”.  I’m beginning to agree with Richard about Jose’s intelligence.

The ladies at ASAP throw around concepts like acceptance, diversity, tolerance. Nene reminds them they are 4 and 5 years old. These ideas are too big. Lisa’s discombobulated according to LaToya. Lisa’s idea of diversity is too general. She doesn’t delegate. Marlee has to say a little prayer as she writes a sign to Lisa that says “tell me what to do”. Lisa’s talking head says in a defeatist manner, I just don’t know what to do with myself.  They all are against me and I’m going down.

Over at The Valley of the Dolls, the women are still trying to come up with their story. NeNe says it’s hard to argue with a 70-year-old woman (Diva Dionne) because it just doesn’t look right. Margie visits the girls. She tells them that kids love animals. LaToya is assigned the animal character. They are gaga over the sentence “Why can’t I roar?” Dionne pissed Marlee off with her ignorance about deaf children being pitied and how it should not be in the storyline. Marlee refuses to be treated like a handicapped person.  NeNe is still hanging back and not really contributing anything to the task at hand. Star gets impatient and insists that Lisa decide on the tone of the story. Is it a happy children’s book, a heavy moral story? What is it? Dionne comes up with the concept and some dialogue. Marlee observes that it is just like a lot of other children’s books she has at home, and if they are going to go with that, it had better be good.

Meat loaf calls Jose and Gary and tells them that he sent them to the wrong theater. He redirects them to the right stage. But, it turns out that they were at the right place the first time. It is a waste of time going back and forth. The lady they were supposed to meet at the theater is on the phone. She is rude and yelling  “Do you know the way to San Jose?” at them.

Then came you Eric Trump. Eric arrives at Backbone’s headquarters and tries to check up on the men but he seems to have poor timing. Meatloaf doesn’t have time for him. He tries to send everyone off to the costumer.  It’s a bit chaotic. Eric feels the men are fragmented.

Nikki feels the concept of their story is too deep and that kids that age don’t know what shy means. The group shoots her down. The women leave Star and NeNe with the illustrator to write and illustrate the book while everyone else heads to the theater.

The guys play around in the costume shop. They aren’t focused. Gary doesn’t like to focus. Mark tries to force him to focus but Gary said “Hey man, Don’t make me over.”  Jose is supposed to be a very large woman in his role as school teacher. He sympathizes with women over high-heals. “Those things hurt”. 

LaToya, Hope, Dionne, and Lisa are ready to Make the Music Play. Dionne takes all the credit for the story concept. When Don Jr. hears their theme he says There’s always something there to remind me of the Wizard of OZ.  It does not meet the originality criteria of the challenge. Star refuses to approve the book’s cover and demands that Lisa come back just to approve the cover. NeNe and Star both say “Tru Dat”.  It sounds really stupid coming from two grown-ass women.

Team ASAP comes home and they are very happy with the look of the book.  They need to come up with the cover. Star wants cover credit for writing and Dionne wants concept credit. They are unbeWEAVABLE. It was a team effort. Marlee is incredulous over such attitude, and frankly, so am I. LaToya cries. Star tells her to suck it up. Lisa finally gets some balls and stands up to them. Lisa says it’s her way. We’re done. Lisa’s talking head says “I will not be taken down by a bunch of bitches” (YAY LISA!!!!!)

The guys get into costume and rehearse backstage. The children begin to arrive. Don Jr. and his family are in the audience. Holly Robinson Peet, and Marjorie The Random Children’s Book Publisher are also in the audience. Lisa and Marlee warm the crowd up with some sign language. Lisa is happy entertaining the kids and she forgets all the other bullshit. The children seem to be enjoying the performance. NeNe interviews that she likes being a rooster and crowing. (Why am I not surprised?)  

Online Exclusive! Watch the celebrities' full performances, then choose your fave.

Meatloaf is the narrator of the men’s story. The guys play little kids in a school room and get lots of giggles. They look hilarious in their raggedy Anne and Andy outfits. Mark is a little unnerved by Holly and Marjorie in the audience but is encouraged by their smiles and laughter. Jose plays the teacher, Miss Conseco. He forgets his lines and a tense moment ensues. Then he continues with his part, encouraging Lil John. Lil John puts on a baseball cap, and a tribal necklace and grows before everyone’s eyes. His confidence erupts into a rap song about knowing his ABCs and his 123s. Meatloaf is emotional with pride over his team’s efforts.

Donald asks Meatloaf who his star player was. He says the whole team was the star. He defends Jose. Meatloaf got rave reviews from his team as Project Manager. Eric and Don remarked on Meatloaf’s emotionalism. Meatloaf says Gary was difficult only for his lack of focus. Gary disagrees and says “I create the character within me, because I’m your puppet.”

Donald complements Lisa’s lips. Tells her she looks much more beautiful now (that her lip implants are removed). He admits he probably shouldn’t be saying so, but he continues with a mini rampage about tattoos and plastic surgery. Dionne, Star and NeNe all criticize Lisa for her lack of focus and control. (shocking!). The three bitch divas gang up and form an alliance, though it will be short lived.  Lisa was nervous and frazzled according to NeNe. Starr is disappointed in Lisa. Says she has a big voice and attitude but is disorganized. She is lucky she had people who had her back and they made sure she did a good job.

The teams examine each other’s books. The women love the men’s book. It’s sweet, adorable.  Marlee says her kids wouldn’t know what rap is. Each team likes their own book better. Don Jr. provides Holly and Marjorie’s feedback. They loved the rhyming of “Not so Little John.” Jose was stiff. Meatloaf needs to read the book to kids not to himself. The confetti at the end might have scared the kids.  Team ASAP is Wishin’ and Hopin’ that their book is the winner. However, their  lead character wasn’t as fleshed out in the book as it was onstage. Their font was too small. The theme was too sophisticated and thus inappropriate for that age group. Cut to Dionne’s disbelief and disappointment and Nikki’s “I told you so” look.

Meatloaf’s team wins. He gets emotional.  He has won $20,000 for his children’s charity. Meatloaf turns red and cries. Donald also announces that he will get the book published and those proceeds will also go to the charity. The men leave the boardroom chanting “ I know my ABC’s  and my 123s” from the story. The women await their doom in the boardroom as the men watch on screen.

Donald gets feeling Lisa has been holding back. She was surprised at how it all played out. She felt physically supported, but not emotionally. Dionne did not support her. Lisa would have liked some kindness from Star. Lisa gave Star credit for writing the book.  She gave Dionne credit for creating it. Starr says Lisa spent the first two hours running around like a chicken with its head cut off. Star doesn’t think she was a good leader. She was not organized. Hope and Nikki want to fly under the radar in this confrontation. Dionne came up with the theme, and they lost largely because of the theme so does that mean she should be fired? Nikki sticks up for Lisa. Nikki says What the world needs now is love

Now Throw Each Other Under The Bus!

Two thirds of the challenge failed on the books writing and theme, and  Star and Dionne have claimed ownership of those tasks. Donald asks LaToya who she would fire. “Shall I tell her? I would look closely at the Project Manager”.   Donald asks Marlee, “who would you fire?” Marlee says Dionne, because she intimidates, she’s blunt, and for the language she used. She demeaned Marlee in front of everyone. Lisa chooses Star and Dionne to go to the chopping block with her. She didn’t skip a beat and the Trumpster was not at all surprised.

According to Don Jr. and Eric, Lisa needs to get tougher. Donald tells Lisa she’s the Project Manager but he’s not seeing any fight in her. Lisa protests but then says she doesn’t fight dirty. Dionne says she would take her stand and fight for what she believes. Lisa says I’m not crumbling, I’m Just Being Myself

Star is silent. Lisa admits she has a lot to learn. Don Jr. asks Star if she would admit something like that, even if it were true?  Lisa tells Star they all begged her to be Project Manager and now they’re throwing her under the f*cking bus. Donald says Lisa, are you telling me You’ve lost that loving feeling?

 Lisa is criticized for leading in fear rather than in the position of knowledge. Now Lisa says she crumbled under the pressure. Donald says she shouldn’t be admitting these things to the judges. Trump says they’re playing her like a child.  When Lisa says she’d fire Dionne for not being a team player, they criticize her for not hitting the main points of the theme and writing. Lisa wants to know Who can I turn to?  Donald says Lisa, It’s All Over. You’re fired. Donald does not like weak. She didn’t have any fight. Dionne is gloating as she and Starr leave the boardroom. She thinks to herself, We never said goodbye.

Peace OUT!!

Next week, on Celebrity Apprentice, the challenge is to create a camping experience, and NeNe says “ I’m afraid that I’ll never fall in love again.”


6 Responses to “Celebrity Apprentice, Episode 2”

  1. Cyn… GREAT RECAP!! I really enjoyed the show last night and dont mind much that its 2 hours! How else are they going to get all the good stuff in with all the crazy characters.

    Lisa was totally out of her league. She felt ganged upon but she offered her self as the sacraficial lamb by not delegating and taking charge. She didnt want to own ANYTHING and couldnt make a single decision and left it up to the majority vote each time.

    Dionne was surprisingly ignorant and mean. Fans are not happy with her at all.

    I think the guys were definitely more cohesive and Gary Busey acted like an asshole reacting like he did to true mistakes and not an intentional screw up. Then he tried to throw meatloaf under the bus before the execution of the task! Lord have mercy.. he may be entertainment but he GOTSA GO!


  2. tvtwaddle said

    Thanks. Did ya notice the italicized words were all Dionne Warwick song titles?
    I agree, Lisa’s demise could be seen from a thousand miles away. The only reason I mind it being so long, is that it ends at 11pm and doesn’t leave me with much time to write afterwards. It also makes for a very long blog. The time goes by very quickly though as there is so much going on at a fast clip.

  3. Yes TVT – I did notice the song titles! How could you not.. unless you were born 10 years ago. 😉 Well I can see why YOU dont want it to last 2 hours LOL!!!

  4. dy said

    The Dionne song titles in the blog were good. I liked that 🙂

    I said last night and will say again, Lisa was out of her league, Star ate her up and spit her out.

    Star is out to win, not to make friends..Believe me no one is safe

    Star and Dionne were such Divas it was terrible, didn’t even try to hide it.

  5. Rosie said

    Thanks for the recap. The Warwick songs were a cute touch.

    Agree Dy, Lisa was so out of her league! She shouldn’t have let them bully her into being the manager in the first place. She wasn’t up to it, but of course, they knew that.

    NeNe is totally flying under the radar. I can’t think of a thing she has contributed, in two episodes. She’s just.. There.

    Star and Dionne may be playing to win, but their reputations and popularity, are not going to improve by these appearances. Really bad!

  6. Amanda said

    Meatloaf’s Charity is called The Painted Turtle! It is an amazing organization founded by Paul Newman.

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